Goodbye, Tarantula

            Tarantula skittered from the snowy window into the dust-ridden bedroom. She paced left and right. She could sense the termites eating away at the bedframe, and the carpet beetles shimmying out the closet. But overlapping those signals was the mouse family’s squeaks: the voice of a mother comforting her children from the hailstorm. Tarantula left the room.

* * *

            After several hours exploring the nooks and crannies of the house, Tarantula found a cubby-hole on the floor beside the kitchen sink. She crawled in and allowed herself to get comfortable.

* * *

            The footsteps of an ant colony. She detected a line of them trooping past her. She swiped them into her mouth without hesitation. They scattered, and she lunged after a few more.

            When they were gone, she remained standing. Still as a stone.

            Minutes passed. Then she crawled back into her den.

* * *

            A high-pitched screech alerted her. It was followed by a second, crackly voice. She exited the den. The sound was laughter. Tarantula traveled to its location.

            She entered the living room and found, on the knotted carpet, a turtle lying on its back, and two ravens standing before it.

            “You buffoon!” One of the ravens said. “What, did you think you could run from us?”

            The living room was bustling with traffic. Tarantula could sense it. The roaches congregating under the furniture. The flies hovering by the molded wallpaper. She saw a stinkbug stroll past the turtle and the ravens.

            “If only we could rip you out of your shell,” the raven said.

            “Had our beaks been sharper,” the other raven said. “We’d pierce that meaty head of yours.”

            One of the ravens turned its gaze directly at Tarantula. Tarantula stood motionless. For minutes. Then she skittered back into the kitchen, back into her den.

* * *

            From a window, white light poured into the kitchen. Hail was replaced by snow flurries. From a hole in a tree, the cheerful chirps of sparrows. Remarks at the prettiness of the snow. The desire to fly out among it.

            Tarantula could sense this. Just as she could sense the presence of the ravens, still somewhere in the house. Just as she could deduce the turtle was still on its back.

* * *

            Hours passed before Tarantula left her den. When she did, she went straight to the living room, and flipped the turtle right side up again. At this, the turtle beamed.

            “Golly, thanks!” the turtle said. “Thank you so much! I thought I’d be scrambled like that forever!”

            Tarantula stood motionless. The snow continued outside the house. Tarantula turned. The turtle tried to mouth something, but couldn’t think of more to say.

            A blast of wind sounded and the turtled leaped into its shell. Angry caws echoed in the room. Then silence.

When the turtle poked its head out, Tarantula and the ravens were gone. The turtle stood and walked toward the open window.

            “Goodbye, Tarantula.”

How to Say Something Unique – The Parts of Speech

One of my favorite parts of writing is creating awesome sentences. To really get the reader unexpecting on each line—to the point where they’re hooked cuz they just HAVE to read the next line—you have to break some conventions.

Here’s a convention: the parts of speech. Nouns are nouns, verbs are verbs, etc. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

I mean, you could sneak inside a building, but you could also patience your way to the front of the line. And you get the same results—one’s just more fun better than the other.

Similarly, you could skip school, but you could also skip eating (this second example uses what’s called a gerrund, which is when an “-ing” verb functions as a noun).

There are many parts of speech and many ways to mess around with them. What will you come up with?

Good Nouns Go a Long Way

Adjectives may be strong, but nouns are powerful. With a good noun, you can go an entire story with an adjective.

Adjectives are strong, but sometimes they can be weak. Take the phrases below for example:

“a funny guy”

“a guy who is funny

Both examples are helpful describg the noun (“guy”) but they are also flawed. In the first phrase, if the page cut off after the adjective “funny,” readers would be confused. A funny what? T-shirt? Song?

The second example shares this flaw. It uses an relative clause (“who is _”) which functions as an adjective, since it describes the noun. It’s a handy technique, but if the page cut off anywhere after “guy” and before “funny,” readers would be lost. Imagine if after the “is” was information that never again gets revealed in a story. The sentence could read: “A guy who is a fan of sentimental operas, though he tends not share this with others.” But readers would only see “a guy who is” and never be fufilled. Ah, the unaddressed suspense…!

Don’t get me wrong, adjectives are great. They can be excellent descriptors, with phrases like “a witty guy” or “a guy who has a wry sense of humor.” But they hold nouns back.

With a good noun in a phrase, you don’t need an adjective:

“A prankster

“A comedian

“An impressionist

In one word, a reader has learned information that previously required two words.

Whenever you’re revising your work, it’s always a good idea to look at the adjectives you’ve used and decide if they work good or if they could swapped out for a better noun. Happy writing, and seeya next time!

Quote Me On This

Can we learn anything by writing down quotes? I ask myself this sometimes, when I read a punchy phrase in a crime story, or one that tugs my heart’s strings, or one that’s constructed expertly, each word placed like a brick forming a smooth column. I analyze the quotes sometimes, pick them apart like a vulture and savor each segment, then step back again to marvel at the thing as a whole. But how does this help me grow as a writer? I haven’t found myself mimicking the quote. Nor do I want to. I want the pride of having created something myself.

Perhaps it’s got to be a conscious effort. Perhaps it comes down to rereading those quotes a couple times in a week, and deciding to use its technique, whatever it may be for that particular quote that makes it stand out. Perhaps it comes down to rewriting it a few times, and then doing something similar on my own, and then finally my brain will guide me to making my own powerful quote. And if that method doesn’t work, doesn’t lead to me creating my own power quote, at least I’d learn how to appreciate more the one I already loved.

Quotes are like beautiful paintings you hang up and can look at again and again and always draw inspiration from. Quote me on this 😉